Be Brilliant.
Let your light so shine in the world so that others are affected by your gifts.
Be Brave.
Go after your goals fearlessly and wholeheartedly.
Be Beautiful.
Let your spirit ignite the beauty from the inside of your soul to the outside world.
Well, in my last post I was all fired up and ready to go! I was ready to take on the world.
I wrote that post in January. It’s April 5th and I haven’t accomplished that much.
I did declutter and organize my closet, but my clothes are still everywhere.
I bought a goal journal, but I didn’t write anything in it.
I joined a workout class and ate fairly healthy, but I haven’t lost much weight.
Then I realized that I did not look at that post for 3 months.
If you do not constantly refer to, live, and breathe your goals it’s just not going to happen.
I’m writing this post for people like me who have grand ideas and most of the time don’t follow them. For people like me who worry ourselves to the point of giving up. For people like me who dream a lot, but accomplish little because of things in and out of our control.
By this time you are saying one of two things:
1. This girl is a self-loathing complainer and I’m done with her.
2. This girl gets me and I understand exactly how she feels.
The Good News:
No matter how many times you fail, you can always keep trying. Yes it’s 3 months later, but my brain baby has come to life. Yes, I haven’t accomplished as much as I would have liked to, but I will ALWAYS keep trying. And so can you…
When you add suffix -ing to a root word, it means something that it is happening right now. I’ve never been a live in the moment kind of person. I’ve always had dreams of the future and what my life would be like when I got to a certain point. When I would reach that point and didn’t see the pretty picture I hoped for, I grabbed another mental canvas and kept painting dreams of a better tomorrow. That is what has gotten me through life. That is what got me through grad school. Dreams that when I was finished I would land my dream job at the best place ever in fairy tale gum drop land. We all know how this story ends.
Well now I’m done, and I can’t run away from my reality. Not this time. So…what do I do now? No seriously, what the heck do I do now?!? I might need Iyanla to come fix my life because I don’t know the answer to that question.
I guess I’m still searching for the thing that will make me feel like I have reached the next chapter of my life. I realized today that maybe the reason why I struggled so hard mentally to finish grad school was because I knew it meant the end of a really huge chapter of my life, being in school. I’ve been in school non-stop for basically my whole life! I feel like my entire identity was caught up in that, and now that it’s over… I don’t know what to do and I don’t know who I am. I don’t really have a plan. I don’t really have an identity. I just have ideas on things I’m interested in and some inklings of what I feel God is leading me towards, but I am literally terrified. I have so much to do. Declutter my living surroundings, plan my next moves for my career, lose weight, etc.
I’m really excited, but I’m also really nervous because I’m like…how am I going to accomplish all of this? I have put off so much of real life because I was really good at school and that is what people would see of me. I need to find a balance in my life because I kept saying I’ll clean my room after I graduate, I’ll get a therapist after I graduate, I’ll eat healthy after I graduate, I’ll figure out what I want to do with my life after I graduate and here I am after I graduated with so much to do and no idea how to accomplish it all.
I’ve never stuck with and accomplished anything besides school. It’s because I didn’t have a choice. Do well in school or be a failure. I never take my real life as seriously as I felt about school and even that was a struggle at times. I’m a quitter. I’m a complainer. I’ve never been a go getter. I do enough to get me by to the next thing. I have passionate goals and dreams, but not enough fire under me to push me there.
I’m going to write down my goals and mini goals and write down how I am doing at accomplishing them. I feel that it will give me a sense of accountability.
Don’t be afraid to ask for help, encouragement, accountability from others. Who in your life can help you reach your goals? For example, my mom is really good at organizing so she can help me declutter.
I will have some setbacks and that’s okay. It’s expected. No one in the history of ever has tried to reach a goal with smooth sailing. Success does not depend on perfection. We fear setback so much, that sometimes it prevents us from starting things in the first place.
No matter how hard it gets, no matter how tired you are, no matter how many times your brain tells you that you can’t, no matter how many times you fall down, no matter what people say about you, no matter what trenches you have to dig through. DO NOT QUIT. Your life, your future, your legacy depends on the decisions that you make right now. Own it.